Seasons Change

At one point in my life, I was set to get married.  I guess I should back up to explain better.  I am married and I have three kids – Amazing, Amazing 2 and Amazing 3 (and all are that way due to Queen Amazing).  What I mean to say is that at one point in my life, I was set on marrying someone else.  I started looking at rings.  I thought through how I would ask her.  I dropped hints in conversation with her father.  I had dated this young lady for two years.

And yet, it didn’t happen.  We talked.  We realized that we weren’t where we thought we were.  It was awful.  I felt a bit like Lloyd Dobler – “I gave her my heart and she gave me a pen.”  Moving on was the right call, however.  Last I heard she was married.  Me, too.  Good for her.

Moving on is a difficult decision.  As business professionals, how do we determine if it’s time to move on?  I don’t mean just for ourselves, but for those on our teams, too.  For some employees it is easy to see.  Obnoxious behavior mixed with poor work performance.  SEE YA!  It is a simple conversation.  For others, it might be a matter of observation of their buy-in, their spirit, their passion.  Has all of that waned?  Is it being forced?  Are the conversations less fun, only business?  The work might be getting done, but the heart is no longer connected?  Tough call, right?

Surely, the first measure is to have an honest conversation with that person.  Ask good questions about satisfaction, purpose, connection, environment.  Draw out perspective and emotion.  Many of our teammates want to be asked.  The first couple of minutes may be awkward but plow through it.  The fruit of such conversations can alter the fabric of the company.  And sometimes, a trip to Mood is warranted (yes, I watch Project Runway, so?).

However, let’s say that these conversations illicit none of the magic hoped for.  What then?  Go back to the job description.  Is the person doing what he/she is to do?  Does the job description accurately reflect the KSA’s needed?  If collaboration, for example, is needed to do the work and it is not on the JD, then update it.  This will allow for truer dialogue around the duties rather than just a sense of disconnect.  Be mindful, though, to not make the JD too person-specific.  If Joe usually makes the coffee for the office in the morning and he stops doing so, and you sense something is wrong, I wouldn’t change his JD to include coffee preparation (unless he is a Barista).  Look only at the core duties for the role and what is needed to perform it well.

Sometimes, people need a conversation to cause them to “wake up” and look at how off track they’ve gotten.  Sometimes, they need a more formal interaction to do that.  And sometimes, it might lead to a new season for that person and for the company.  Sometimes it’s very healthy for someone to move on, even if they’ve been a decent employee for a while.  Maybe they’ve hit a ceiling and the challenges are few and far between.  Maybe they are at the max for compensation and that takes them down a peg or two.  Maybe they’ve just grown apart from the role.  It happens.

A word to my HR peeps…this applies to you, too.  Some of you need to leave where you are working.  Rough, right?  But I am serious.  You’re too settled, too cranky, too blasé, too distant.  Do a self-check, but also ask for feedback from those who know and work with you.  Staying with a job because you make good money is not helping the company.  Our role is to encourage health and growth within the organizations we serve.  If what we’re modeling is more of a “put my time in” kind of attitude, then we shoot ourselves in the foot.  Trust that your skill sets and aptitudes will open doors elsewhere for you; they can take you to a new challenge where passion and joy return.  Love your company enough to go.

And if you're not ready to go yet, then use the self-assessment and feedback from others to put you back on track.  Raise high the boom box and fight back!

One of my great loves in business is the “fire in your belly” that can grow.  Time does not have to dampen this.  Just because an HR pro or a CEO has been with one company for ten years does not establish some milestone that it’s time to go.  There is a difference between time spent and time served.  Follow?

Seasons change.  There is no question.  I am not in the same role I was in 20 years ago.  I am not in the same role I was in 3 years ago.  And I am not married to the person I almost married 20 years ago.  As painful and scary as those seasons might be, they do change.   

You Gotta Be

Success.  Love that word.  Fraught with meaning.  Many a dream has been realized or demolished against the measure of success.  It’s what everyone CEO wants to deliver to his/her board of directors.  It’s what every publicly traded company wants to deliver to its stockholders.  Success.

We spend millions trying to find it or create it.  We reinvent wheels.  We look to find secrets  that will help to shorten the time it takes to achieve it.  We look for quick results.  We want to have an impact that will generate revenue. 

Having been able to sit with many CEO’s over my years, I have heard variations on the pursuit of success, but all of it basically boiling down to these points.  And what I have often considered is that success is like dieting or getting into shape.

We buy the latest series for weight loss.  We join gyms.  We get up before the crack of dawn to do boot camp in the park.  We bike, hike, take pills and drink shakes.  We’ve worn leg warmers with Jane Fonda, sweat to the oldies with Richard Simmons, Tae Bo’d with Billy Blanks, Pilate’d, P90X’d, Insanity’d.  We cleanse, eat organic, say no to carbs, say no to fats, say no to dairy, say no to red meat.  The exercise, fitness and diet industries are multi-billion dollar industries. 

And yet, in the US, we are the most obese population ever.  Curious.

Success seems to be the same.  We commit to so much to make our companies excel.  We hire consultants, fire consultants, post new mission statements, develop incentive-based compensation plans.  I am not saying this is all for naught.  I will be the first one to tout the values of knowing where you want to get to and leading that team with conviction.

What we ought not to do is join the fitness program at Exhale Spa, buy a new outfit from LuluLemon, workout for a week or two, get tired of it, make excuses, grow fat, be disappointed in our efforts (or lack thereof) and then look for the next quick fix.  Success is built on the pain of consistency and failure. 

Our capabilities are real.  We should encourage the greatness that lies within each of us; the full effect of that will be realized within an organization.  These are not mere words, but rather a call to action.  As leaders we must engage a concept of success that is realistic.  Set the foundation with mission and vision, lay framework with expectations and accountability, add components of structure with trial, collaboration, skills and communication.  These components are refined over time.

Success is rarely overnight.  Success is not a destination but a journey.  Once success is “achieved,” you have to start at it again tomorrow.  Every day, you gotta be ready for what the call to success asks for – consistency, excellence, commitment and sweat!

Blame It On the Rain

Deflection is an art.  We can really get great at showcasing our ability to deflect responsibility and avoid consequences.  In my life, I have known people who were great at this.  Some might even say I know how to do this well.  Perhaps they are right, but it seems to be such a requirement in the workplace that likely I've adopted methodology.

Remember when Milli Vanilli were caught lip-syncing.  And then we found out they didn't sing the songs that they won Grammys for.  And then they were embarrassed.  And then they blamed the record company.  And then they blamed the pressure to succeed.  (And then they released a demo of them actually singing? Just awful, by the way)  Lots of blame being tossed around. 

And why?  Why is this the norm?  Maybe some of it comes from the overbearing nature of some moms and dads (it's always about mom and dad, isn't it?).  "Little Jimmy" could do no wrong in school ("it was that lousy teacher"), in sports ("the coach never gave him a chance") or in his first job ("it's the summer and they wanted him to work 8 hours in one day...the nerve!").  Mom and Dad could have meant well, but instead shut off the ability to fail, to stumble, to learn from his/her mistakes.

Maybe it's because our society doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.  I work with many companies that are corporately held in another country.  When those CEO's engage with US workers, they notice how quickly feelings are hurt.  It's an oddity to most of them.  Are we too sensitive?  Maybe.  I mean, just because I still cry at the end of every repeat episode of Touched By An Angel doesn't make me sensitive, right?  But I digress...

It's not unusual for an employee to blame another employee or a process as the reasons why something didn't work or why he/she was unable to complete a task appropriately.  There may very well be truth to what that employee shares, but does it excuse the employee from getting the job done?  Some companies that have stagnated find themselves making excuses along with employees as to why things aren't working.  We think that more policies, more parameters, more rules, more goals, more more more will motivated change in process, in employee attitude, in results.  OK, America, how's that working out?

If you don't like that your employees do it, have you checked to see if they are learning by example?  Of course, this is not going to be the case in all situations.  There is some tough love needed with some employees.  They need to know that it's not okay to just wait for everything to be fixed before they work harder, smarter, better.  They have to be accountable to their performance.  If something is not right, what have they done to bring it to the right channels or, even more so, to try to correct it?  We want to encourage innovation, critical thought and a healthy work ethic.

But sometimes, as I said, the company leadership has fallen into an excuse-laden mode of operation.  Once we find the right people, things will get better.  Once the new product line is tested, we will start to make money.  Once the economy changes, we will be in better shape.  I cannot tell you how many CEO's have said or thought that a new political party in power would change everything.  It's not Bush's fault your company isn't working out nor is it Obama's fault.  Of course there are things we wish they had done differently to help US companies, but regardless, it's the company leadership's responsibility to make things work in the context of what is, not in what's wished for.

Survey the environment, study the competition, take financial management courses, work with experts...do whatever it takes to make your company great.  If you are a business leader, take that role seriously and expect it to be hard.  If you are an employee, figure out ways to make your job work the way it ought to so that you can achieve the results expected. 

For all of us, life is not about waiting for things to work out.  You probably won't hit the lottery.  You probably won't retire at 40.  You probably won't get your way in everything.  So what does that mean?  Blame?  For our company?  For our spouse?  For our children?  For our parents?  Really, think.  What does that get us?

Be committed to excellence, not blame.  Be willing to own what you are not doing well and then decide to change.  Seek help.  Seek collaboration.  Seek ingenuity.  We're much better than blame.  Divert those energies into something remarkably positive.