Come Together

Cat videos.  I can’t believe that the best we can do with the power of the internet is fill it with cats in various poses and outfits.  I did, however, see a video recently where a cat who was raised on a show horse farm trotted along the property as if she were in competition.  This cat would raise her knees high and keep her head forward.  It was pretty remarkable to see how much she was influenced by her environment.

Consequently, it got me thinking about our ability to assimilate.  And while this has nothing to do with show horse competition (my knees don’t raise as high as they once did…darn long jump), it has everything to do with influence.  The cat in that video did not have to be instructed to mimic the horses in training.  She observed and assimilated her behavior to match.  There is likely not a need that this cat is filling with such training, other than a social media desire for a million likes, but there is a lesson for us.

Assimilation can be both a positive and a negative.  Consider peer pressure.  It is usually delivered in a negative context.  Parents want to keep their kids from those that would lead them down a negative or wrong road.  We want them to avoid those situations where peer pressure takes over, leading to drinking, drugs, crime, etc.  We want them to choose well.  Perhaps having a friend group that wants to pursue the same type of good choices is a sort of peer pressure opportunity.  When one of that group wants to choose poorly, their friends motivate, tease and remind them of why that choice is dumb.  Peer pressure can work both ways.

In our work environments, isn’t this true as well?  Staff assimilate to their surroundings.  If there is a “don’t work too hard” mentality that most staff follow, then a new addition to the team, however awesome the work history had been, is likely to assimilate to the unspoken request of co-workers.  It’s observed.  It is understood that this is just how things are. 

Understand, too, that assimilation does not have to mean a forfeiting of individuality.  The creative contribution, personal experiences and innovative outlets that each person brings should be shared and used.  That can be the mark of what it means to assimilate in your organization - everyone has made a commitment to offer, invest and engage in the community for the good of the whole.  The Rat Pack, for example, didn't minimize each individual's giftedness, but rather they found a way to affirm strengths and assimilate as one cohesive entertainment experience.  The difficulty of the social environment in terms of race, religion and heritage did not thwart their ability to engage the public.  In many ways, the Rat Pack caused their audiences to assimilate to a new reality, at least during their performances.  The display of such an integration isn't going to be the same for each group of people, but the overall commitment to it should be similar.

Our leadership can and should drive change in this area.  It’s not a pipe dream or a warm & fuzzy movement, but rather a business necessity.  Turnover may very well be connected to a poor environment that an individual cannot assimilate to.  The assimilation may have much to do with an inability to make a difference or a contribution of substance.  Certainly someone can move one stack of papers to another stack.  The tasks may be basically completed, for instance, but the drive for more is not explored and encouraged.  By and large, people will rise to the expectation that’s laid out.  If we don’t lay out something bigger, then don’t be surprised that the culture feels sluggish or entitled.

Assimilation needs to start with a few.  Gather a couple to yourself and pour into them.  If something is wrong with the environment, a memo to all won’t cut it.  Think of it like a diet.  Just holding yourself accountable to what not to eat isn’t enough; it’s a matter of understanding and holding yourself accountable to what you should eat.  Offer the alternative and maintain that offering.  Behavior will change through that consistency.  It will become habit and influence the environment.

An assimilation to healthy culture, process and contribution is a positive. Helping them see how they fit, how they contribute and how the team functions cohesively through it are worthy goals.  That's an assimilation.  It’s something that you can start to do today by rallying those few around these goals.  It’s a conquerable task.  Be visual about it to your team.  Let them join you in painting a picture of the end game.  

Maybe even video best practices.  Let those few help to start a momentum through various creative media outlets.  I mean, we could always use more cat videos, right?

Are We Ourselves?

Assertive versus Aggressive.  Confidence versus Conceit.  As a leader, we might display one over the other.  There was a guy I knew in high school who parlayed confidence into conceit on a regular basis.  He annoyed the crap out of me, but I found myself swimming in his lane to fight back.  I had become that rude jerk.  I was merely trying to be an assertive alpha male (my skinny frame didn't make it so easy to do....stupid track team), but it didn't translate that way to others.

While an assertive person channels and promotes good communication, the slide into aggression parlays that into interruption and talking over people.  It's a subtle slide.  There are characteristics that start healthy enough but then become twisted and contorted by a shifting foundation.

Is there something more lurking just a little deeper?  A lack of self-esteem may be at play.  It's not to say you don't have any self-esteem, but rather it's development might be askew.  Dr. Michael Miller, former editor in chief of the Harvard Mental Health Letter, says, “It’s more likely that self-esteem will come as a result of accurate self-understanding, appreciation of one’s genuine skills, and the satisfaction of helping others.”  As managers, is this our stance?

Observations for years show me how much management often find their identity in the work they do.  This becomes the basis for self-worth and self-esteem.  And this is a simple recipe for disaster.  When we base our esteem upon shifting sand, such as a particular organization, the work being done or even the people we work with, the foundation is based upon change.  People leave, we leave, the work changes and organizations are sold, merged, restructured or altered.  If we live for the company, we will be disappointed.

Our audience, however, might be receiving management poorly based upon the dilemma of assertive/aggressive or confidence/conceit.  Again, if it's a matter of self-esteem, your staff can easily identify the difference.  When a manager is over-the-top or a micro-manager, the talk among employees will start rather quickly.  It sets a tone for response that's based upon someone's individual needs (in this case, the manager) rather than the good of the whole.  Staff begin to look for ways to avoid the wrath of a manager or even seeing the manager at all.  These goals supersede the goals of the department in the work to be done.

Such a backwards setup.  We short-circuit the efforts towards our department's goals by the way in which we struggle to handle ourselves and the workload, for instance.  Help is an okay option.  It's not a sign of weakness, despite the possibility that your employer may think so.  And while I know your job is important to you (your finances, for example!), it cannot be that you should become less of the person you are or are meant to be.  Simple to say, right?  But what does it profit you to be aggressive, struggling with self-esteem or self-worth and not meet the goals you've set for work?  Right the ship.  Take the time necessary to unravel what's been going on.

Typically, managing the esteem of a manager is not on a job description, yet we see it happen.  Don't be the manager putting employees in this situation.  Get grounded outside of the work.  Then, when work needs to be done, it is a matter of how to best do it, apart from it fulfilling some esteem needs.  And while I am far from a self-help guru, I do know enough that there is truth that a person must discover for himself/herself that is separate from work, from a person or from status.  Take the time to examine yourself and find out what's true about you.

In human resources, we can find ourselves giving so much to others, which is a part of our job, that we tax our own foundation.  We must be sure to connect inwardly.

Pushing the envelope is worth it.  Don't fear being assertive.  It does matter in driving the goals of your department.  However, it is meant to be done with a specific goal in mind for the organization, not for your esteem.  If work defines you, take a small step back and look at the bigger picture.  Your role needs you to be as with it as possible.  You are the one in the role for a reason.  Get back to you.

I Fought the Law

Try to watch “Law and Order” as if you’ve never seen an episode before.  Pretend like those two Bum-Bumps are the first time you’ve heard them.  It’s fascinating to watch the entire hour and see how the two detectives process the investigation which typically leads to the court case.  I used to watch the original “Law and Order” religiously.  Yes, I know that there are SVU, CI, SUV and hybrid versions, but I was a fan of the original.  The course of action taken by the detectives is methodical, a bit stale and thorough, but it works.

For the employee who comes to the HR department with a complaint, inquiry or charge, there is an expectation for answers and investigation.  HR loves the answers, but perhaps to a fault.  Our ability to provide solution to the complaint may not really handle the issue at hand.  The employee can feel his/her issue has been minimized as he/she leaves your office (or cubicle area or working table or Segway mobile office).  Are we satisfied with just an “answer” or do we need to spend time trying to understand where this issue comes from?

Honestly, there are times that a simple answer is all that is needed.  Let’s not make a mountain out of molehill.  If someone comes to complain about not being off for Arbor Day, that may be a very quick conversation.  Something like, “I’m sorry that you’d like the company to be closed for Arbor Day, but if you have PTO available to you, perhaps you could plan on using some in order to spend time planting trees to honor the day.”  Smile sincerely and usher them out.  Close the door and reflect on why you’ve chosen the career you have.  After a few minutes, you’ll be back at it!

But what about the ones that take a bit more?  If an employee asks about hours not paid on a paycheck, then perhaps a quick look at the time system, finding where the data was corrupt or not transferred into payroll will prevent the occurrence in the future.  Perhaps there is a bit of management training needed.  Perhaps the employee needs a reminder on the time clock.  Perhaps it’s a one-time Gremlin in the system.  All it would take is a little bit of research mixed with a little bit of conversation and/or training.

And then, there are the ultimate investigations, such as harassment, discrimination or theft.  A process for this investigation should be in place.  What will it take for the company to handle the claims presented?  Is there a path to follow?  No? 

There are components of good investigation that are universal.  Try to work within a flow of process in those components in order to gather the information needed.  An investigation is serious and it does require professionalism in approach.  If you are the HR person who would lead or conduct the investigation, have you established yourself in the company as someone capable of such work?  If you’ve been relegated or allowed yourself to be relegated to the party-planning HR person or the gossip-laden HR person, then it’s not likely that you’ll gather all of the data necessary in your investigation.

Staff may not be able to draw a line between the “Buddy HR” person and the “Detective HR” person you’re trying to be.  That is a tall order.  As such, determine whether outside help might be needed.  Does your process allow for this possibility?  Between the HR role played, the characters in the investigation and the subject matter involved, an outside expert might be the most beneficial for the organization.  Be okay with letting someone in.  It’s not about dirty laundry but about ascertaining the truth and finding solution, however difficult that may be.

Be clear, too, in the fact that you will need to speak with others.  When an employee starts his/her complaint to you with “Please don’t say anything, but…”, you can be sure that you’re likely going to need to say something to someone else.  A true investigation will need facts and accounts from all parties named and involved.  Keeping this between us is not possible, let alone the matter of law that may be in play.  Disclosure may be required.  Consult your counsel if you have questions in any of these areas.  Likely an attorney will tell you that you cannot promise to keep what’s shared only between you two.

There are great resources available to you to help with investigation.  Take the time to research and develop a plan prior to needing a plan.  You will be able to approach plan development with less stress and with more clarity of thought.  Talk to your senior team, your counsel, your HR colleagues in other companies, your SHRM group…anyone who has been through developing a process.  Learn from their victories and hiccups.

And while it may not be the wisest to wear a badge around the office as if you’re the cop on duty, you should establish yourself as being an integral part of the investigative process at your company.  Just pin the badge on the inside of your suit coat or sweater.  You can know it’s there.  Bum-Bump.

You Gotta Be

Success.  Love that word.  Fraught with meaning.  Many a dream has been realized or demolished against the measure of success.  It’s what everyone CEO wants to deliver to his/her board of directors.  It’s what every publicly traded company wants to deliver to its stockholders.  Success.

We spend millions trying to find it or create it.  We reinvent wheels.  We look to find secrets  that will help to shorten the time it takes to achieve it.  We look for quick results.  We want to have an impact that will generate revenue. 

Having been able to sit with many CEO’s over my years, I have heard variations on the pursuit of success, but all of it basically boiling down to these points.  And what I have often considered is that success is like dieting or getting into shape.

We buy the latest series for weight loss.  We join gyms.  We get up before the crack of dawn to do boot camp in the park.  We bike, hike, take pills and drink shakes.  We’ve worn leg warmers with Jane Fonda, sweat to the oldies with Richard Simmons, Tae Bo’d with Billy Blanks, Pilate’d, P90X’d, Insanity’d.  We cleanse, eat organic, say no to carbs, say no to fats, say no to dairy, say no to red meat.  The exercise, fitness and diet industries are multi-billion dollar industries. 

And yet, in the US, we are the most obese population ever.  Curious.

Success seems to be the same.  We commit to so much to make our companies excel.  We hire consultants, fire consultants, post new mission statements, develop incentive-based compensation plans.  I am not saying this is all for naught.  I will be the first one to tout the values of knowing where you want to get to and leading that team with conviction.

What we ought not to do is join the fitness program at Exhale Spa, buy a new outfit from LuluLemon, workout for a week or two, get tired of it, make excuses, grow fat, be disappointed in our efforts (or lack thereof) and then look for the next quick fix.  Success is built on the pain of consistency and failure. 

Our capabilities are real.  We should encourage the greatness that lies within each of us; the full effect of that will be realized within an organization.  These are not mere words, but rather a call to action.  As leaders we must engage a concept of success that is realistic.  Set the foundation with mission and vision, lay framework with expectations and accountability, add components of structure with trial, collaboration, skills and communication.  These components are refined over time.

Success is rarely overnight.  Success is not a destination but a journey.  Once success is “achieved,” you have to start at it again tomorrow.  Every day, you gotta be ready for what the call to success asks for – consistency, excellence, commitment and sweat!