Come Together

Cat videos.  I can’t believe that the best we can do with the power of the internet is fill it with cats in various poses and outfits.  I did, however, see a video recently where a cat who was raised on a show horse farm trotted along the property as if she were in competition.  This cat would raise her knees high and keep her head forward.  It was pretty remarkable to see how much she was influenced by her environment.

Consequently, it got me thinking about our ability to assimilate.  And while this has nothing to do with show horse competition (my knees don’t raise as high as they once did…darn long jump), it has everything to do with influence.  The cat in that video did not have to be instructed to mimic the horses in training.  She observed and assimilated her behavior to match.  There is likely not a need that this cat is filling with such training, other than a social media desire for a million likes, but there is a lesson for us.

Assimilation can be both a positive and a negative.  Consider peer pressure.  It is usually delivered in a negative context.  Parents want to keep their kids from those that would lead them down a negative or wrong road.  We want them to avoid those situations where peer pressure takes over, leading to drinking, drugs, crime, etc.  We want them to choose well.  Perhaps having a friend group that wants to pursue the same type of good choices is a sort of peer pressure opportunity.  When one of that group wants to choose poorly, their friends motivate, tease and remind them of why that choice is dumb.  Peer pressure can work both ways.

In our work environments, isn’t this true as well?  Staff assimilate to their surroundings.  If there is a “don’t work too hard” mentality that most staff follow, then a new addition to the team, however awesome the work history had been, is likely to assimilate to the unspoken request of co-workers.  It’s observed.  It is understood that this is just how things are. 

Understand, too, that assimilation does not have to mean a forfeiting of individuality.  The creative contribution, personal experiences and innovative outlets that each person brings should be shared and used.  That can be the mark of what it means to assimilate in your organization - everyone has made a commitment to offer, invest and engage in the community for the good of the whole.  The Rat Pack, for example, didn't minimize each individual's giftedness, but rather they found a way to affirm strengths and assimilate as one cohesive entertainment experience.  The difficulty of the social environment in terms of race, religion and heritage did not thwart their ability to engage the public.  In many ways, the Rat Pack caused their audiences to assimilate to a new reality, at least during their performances.  The display of such an integration isn't going to be the same for each group of people, but the overall commitment to it should be similar.

Our leadership can and should drive change in this area.  It’s not a pipe dream or a warm & fuzzy movement, but rather a business necessity.  Turnover may very well be connected to a poor environment that an individual cannot assimilate to.  The assimilation may have much to do with an inability to make a difference or a contribution of substance.  Certainly someone can move one stack of papers to another stack.  The tasks may be basically completed, for instance, but the drive for more is not explored and encouraged.  By and large, people will rise to the expectation that’s laid out.  If we don’t lay out something bigger, then don’t be surprised that the culture feels sluggish or entitled.

Assimilation needs to start with a few.  Gather a couple to yourself and pour into them.  If something is wrong with the environment, a memo to all won’t cut it.  Think of it like a diet.  Just holding yourself accountable to what not to eat isn’t enough; it’s a matter of understanding and holding yourself accountable to what you should eat.  Offer the alternative and maintain that offering.  Behavior will change through that consistency.  It will become habit and influence the environment.

An assimilation to healthy culture, process and contribution is a positive. Helping them see how they fit, how they contribute and how the team functions cohesively through it are worthy goals.  That's an assimilation.  It’s something that you can start to do today by rallying those few around these goals.  It’s a conquerable task.  Be visual about it to your team.  Let them join you in painting a picture of the end game.  

Maybe even video best practices.  Let those few help to start a momentum through various creative media outlets.  I mean, we could always use more cat videos, right?

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Is it really?  I heard a woman severely curse off a Walmart Customer Service representative, while the woman’s 2 year-old child was in tow listening to every word.  I have had quite a few people tell me this is the worst time of year.  I have seen more than the usual amount of birds being flipped out of car windows on the highway.  And I have observed a toddler lose their mind on the streets of NYC because his mother wouldn’t buy him the toy he needed.  Ah, the holidays.

And when I walk through the halls of companies, I see employees devoid of emotion going through the task-management of the holiday season with no connection to one another or to the joy of the season.  I see managers with scowls, associates with the faintest hint of a fake smile and HR people stressed out of their minds due to W2’s, ACA 1095’s, compliance reporting, labor law updates, minimum wage changes and the list goes on.

Know what I say?  Enjoy the time.  Embrace the thrill of the season.  Go to a department store or mall and watch the little kids excitedly get on Santa’s lap.  Find those who have not yet been jaded by life and have learned to hate this time.  Change the vantage point you’re working from.

True followers of behavioral modification will tell you that change happens now.  Just make the change, that’s the easy part.  Stop with the frown and get on with the smile.  And yet, the trick in behavioral modification is sustainability.  What can be done to keep behavior changed?  How does the decision I’ve made today last longer than just today?

For all people, it comes down to the same decision being made every day.  Today may be the first day, but there are more days to consider and decide on.  I know for me that today has enough troubles of its own, so I don’t need to travel too far down the road of what might be in days to come.  Focus on today first.  What am I doing and why?

For those with real pain that seems to pierce the veil during the holiday season, I hear you.  Take courage because there are many in the same boat.  Find each other and decide to be a reason for joy for him/her.  Look for ways to serve others and watch how much the burden lifts from you.  It’s not idealistic; it’s psychological. 

My friend +Steve Browne often speaks of being positive in HR.  One of the best ways to do it is to foster deliberate and simple steps to think differently.  We don’t have to have our Master’s degrees or 300 letters after our names to be able to affect change in thought and dynamic.  We have to inspire others to make healthy decisions for themselves and, in turn, for the organization.  Our culture is impacted greatly by such an attitude in staff.

When I watch “Elf” each season, I am always struck by the forced conformity placed upon Buddy by his father and the world around him.  His overly enthusiastic self is asked to be buttoned down into a suit and tie.  He rebels, puts back on the elf suit and reconnects with Santa.  The rebellion is based upon a decision.  He decides to return to the positivity of what he knows.  We, too, have the choice to return to the positivity of what we know.  You're always going to have a new law to adhere to; we always do so don't stress.  Get the elf suit on and enjoy this time of year!

Into the Woods

I am a sucker for a good story.  Basic story-telling should grab the listener early on, keep that person glued to the next word and then amaze and challenge to wrap it up.  In the musical Into the Woods, a mish-mosh of fairy tales come together, initially in ways we would expect, but then all of it collapses around us, such challenges are presented.  The pithy and wise-beyond measure granules of truth that come out of it are poignant, if not stunning at times.   The baker's wife sings "But if life were only moments, then you'd never know you had one."  The witch painfully sings "Children may not obey, but children will listen."  Or, my favorite, the Prince states, "I was raised to be charming, not sincere."

It's often the case that the simplest of stories can turn a head back to true north.  Our gauge can be put off from purpose and passions because of the myriad of distractions in front of us.  Our perspective has to be re-adjusted.  We need to wake up.  Sometimes, a trip to the woods is exactly what is needed.

Whether for a business or for an individual, this journey is one to be taken every so often.  What can the challenges that come with walking through a different set of scenery do for you?  Think about your company.  What if you had three people walk in, at times you didn't know, when you were not there, and then report back what they observed.  Would there be value in that?  Of course!  The meadow that you think you're lunching in may turn out to be full of thorns (or at least have some thorny patches).  

Perhaps it is wise to walk into a competitor's location and observe.  You know, shop or use their services, but really just be there to take it all in.  Sound deceptive?  Nah.  The great car makers bought cars from competitors.  Mr. Gimbel shopped in Macy's once in a while.  It's good.  It's profitable.

As individuals, the same push is there for us.  Are we walking in the woods?  Have I settled for complacency?  Another line from Into the Woods is "you're not good, you're not bad, you're just nice."  How awful!  Listen, I think I am a pretty good guy, but I would rather have someone hate me than just think I am nice...bleck!

With a new year upon us, what will you do to travel the path towards a new view, a new status, a new scene?  I could give you a hundred ideas, but the point is to start the journey.  Those doors will open.  The pathway will become clearer.  You will run into wolves, witches, princes and giants.  All of them will help you to see who you are and who you want to strive to be.  The inspiration comes not only from those feel-good moments, but also from those moments of despair and tragedy.

Businesses must be sharp and ready.  People must be challenged and pushed.  We have each other.  Walk the path with someone.  Don't fear.  Go to the woods!

Make It Like It Was

I spoke with a business owner recently (normal, I know).  He’s pretty successful in his field.  He works hard, really hard.  Long hours, tough working conditions, great product.  He was commenting to me that it seems to be harder to be an employer these days.  He’s been at this for quite some years and has enough history to make a comment like that.  He was basing this on his more recent experience.  He has observed that people don’t want to work hard anymore and that people find it too easy to complain (or sue) about things they just don’t like, rather than what’s truly illegal.

I like this guy.  I do.  It’s not just because he feels the pain of some of the HR situations I find myself in.  It’s not because I think all people suck (I don’t, really…no, really).  I find him to be honest.  His frustrations represent a belief that some of the systems put in place to protect people have now become crutches for some.  I concur.  He isn’t lying.

What I have often said is that it’s about people not programs.  It’s wonderfully smart to have sexual harassment seminars for your staff, but does it stop people from claiming that harassment has occurred?  No.  And why is that?  Maybe it’s because it’s too easy to get a payout.  Why go through all of the drama of court?  Why spend all of that money and waste time when the results will probably be the same settlement anyway?  It’s been the pattern for quite some time.

I’d like to submit a thought.  Culture.  I recognize compliance.  I recognize culpability.  Culture, done well, trumps much.  Fit matters more than need.  Filling a need with the first available often does not work out.  Waiting for someone who fits the culture is worth it in the long run.  Too many times we fill to fill, to check it off the list.  We did it…yay, us!  Woo Hoo, Recruiting Team!  (OK, too sarcastically HR…sorry).

Patience, people.  Let’s find us some good peeps!  When people are set up for success in a culture that fits, then a multitude of problems never happen.  I am not saying that harassment training is a waste.  I am not saying that at all.  What I am saying is that if you think annual sexual harassment training is going to keep it from happening or at least the complaint of it happening, then you’re out of your tree.  Train to the positives daily.  Handle the negatives as they come up.

By creating a culture of health through challenging opportunities and open communication, then you’re more likely to see people flourish and not take the time to be entitled.  We can’t fear the impact of the claim that might come up (anyone can sue for anything…welcome to America).  Instead of being overwhelmed in frustration by it, we should use that energy to positively promote healthy dialogue and right thinking in relationships. 

Management should be encouraged greatly.  As HR, we have a big responsibility with managers and ought to regularly seek to impact them.

Do I think that things are better today in the working environment?  Sure, but when compared to specific places in time.  Do I think we operate in fear rather than proactivity?  Yup.  Our companies might see fear in their own eyes, but that view doesn't have to be true.  Point out a clearer picture.  Practice painting it yourself.  Create buy-in.  Invest in people and impact overall culture.  

The good old days are seen through rose-colored glasses.  It's like any form of nostalgia.  It always looks better from behind.  Just imagine how good today will look in 20 years when we make it as awesome as possible (yeah, I said "awesome").

Waiting on the World to Change

Discipline.  Love it.  In the context of achieving a goal, it's fantastically needed.  To endeavor to lose weight, for example, requires discipline.  It requires commitment, determination and resolve.  I've been exercising forever.  My mom says that when I was a toddler, I used to watch a show, "Exercise with Gloria," on our local Philadelphia station and would imitate the aerobic and stretching moves.  I was committed to doing what she did - stance by stance, stretch by stretch.  As adults, when we watch someone exercise discipline towards such a health-related goal, we are inspired.

So why does the use of the word "discipline" have to change when applied to correction?  When I discipline one of my kids, which I hardly ever have to do because they rock (truth be told, they usually have to provide correction for their dad), I'd like to think I offer it as an encouragement towards excellence and validation of my commitment to their well-being.  Of course, the relational aspect helps to bridge these intentions.

In the workplace, can we provide a similar position in how we administer discipline?  Think about the goal of discipline at the workplace - it's to change behavior.  Let's do Psych 101, shall we?  Behavior modification is best achieved through a few steps at the workplace:

1. Define the problem for the employee and allow the employee to ask questions for understanding
2. Discuss practical ways to address the issue and allow for collaboration, when prudent, from the employee
3. Ensure the active behavior changes are both initiative and reactive in usage (What will I do differently? - initiative; How will I respond differently in the next similar situation? - reactive)
4. Hold the employee accountable for the agreed upon changes

Very simple and straight-forward, right?  Well, the list may be, but the implementation will take more effort.  For some of you, your companies already engage in this type of positive discipline, but for many, this represents a counter-culture method to the argumentative, vindictive or stoic nature of discipline currently in place.  We know that long-term behavioral changes come with deeper connectivity to the issue at hand and to the solutions that will affect the desired change.  Whether it's lateness or a problem with productivity, if we can provide discipline that outlines clearly the issue, the solution and the method to achieve it with collaborative understanding from the employee, it's a home run.

We get to be the ones who enact such change in approach to employee discipline.  Don't wait for your boss, your managers or the world, for that matter, to change first.  From a scientific and measurable way, we can show that approaching employee discipline from this angle will bring a marked difference.  Discipline is not a scary word or activity.  Now, strap on your Thigh Master while at work and get to it!  Get motivated to change employee discipline!