Come Together

Cat videos.  I can’t believe that the best we can do with the power of the internet is fill it with cats in various poses and outfits.  I did, however, see a video recently where a cat who was raised on a show horse farm trotted along the property as if she were in competition.  This cat would raise her knees high and keep her head forward.  It was pretty remarkable to see how much she was influenced by her environment.

Consequently, it got me thinking about our ability to assimilate.  And while this has nothing to do with show horse competition (my knees don’t raise as high as they once did…darn long jump), it has everything to do with influence.  The cat in that video did not have to be instructed to mimic the horses in training.  She observed and assimilated her behavior to match.  There is likely not a need that this cat is filling with such training, other than a social media desire for a million likes, but there is a lesson for us.

Assimilation can be both a positive and a negative.  Consider peer pressure.  It is usually delivered in a negative context.  Parents want to keep their kids from those that would lead them down a negative or wrong road.  We want them to avoid those situations where peer pressure takes over, leading to drinking, drugs, crime, etc.  We want them to choose well.  Perhaps having a friend group that wants to pursue the same type of good choices is a sort of peer pressure opportunity.  When one of that group wants to choose poorly, their friends motivate, tease and remind them of why that choice is dumb.  Peer pressure can work both ways.

In our work environments, isn’t this true as well?  Staff assimilate to their surroundings.  If there is a “don’t work too hard” mentality that most staff follow, then a new addition to the team, however awesome the work history had been, is likely to assimilate to the unspoken request of co-workers.  It’s observed.  It is understood that this is just how things are. 

Understand, too, that assimilation does not have to mean a forfeiting of individuality.  The creative contribution, personal experiences and innovative outlets that each person brings should be shared and used.  That can be the mark of what it means to assimilate in your organization - everyone has made a commitment to offer, invest and engage in the community for the good of the whole.  The Rat Pack, for example, didn't minimize each individual's giftedness, but rather they found a way to affirm strengths and assimilate as one cohesive entertainment experience.  The difficulty of the social environment in terms of race, religion and heritage did not thwart their ability to engage the public.  In many ways, the Rat Pack caused their audiences to assimilate to a new reality, at least during their performances.  The display of such an integration isn't going to be the same for each group of people, but the overall commitment to it should be similar.

Our leadership can and should drive change in this area.  It’s not a pipe dream or a warm & fuzzy movement, but rather a business necessity.  Turnover may very well be connected to a poor environment that an individual cannot assimilate to.  The assimilation may have much to do with an inability to make a difference or a contribution of substance.  Certainly someone can move one stack of papers to another stack.  The tasks may be basically completed, for instance, but the drive for more is not explored and encouraged.  By and large, people will rise to the expectation that’s laid out.  If we don’t lay out something bigger, then don’t be surprised that the culture feels sluggish or entitled.

Assimilation needs to start with a few.  Gather a couple to yourself and pour into them.  If something is wrong with the environment, a memo to all won’t cut it.  Think of it like a diet.  Just holding yourself accountable to what not to eat isn’t enough; it’s a matter of understanding and holding yourself accountable to what you should eat.  Offer the alternative and maintain that offering.  Behavior will change through that consistency.  It will become habit and influence the environment.

An assimilation to healthy culture, process and contribution is a positive. Helping them see how they fit, how they contribute and how the team functions cohesively through it are worthy goals.  That's an assimilation.  It’s something that you can start to do today by rallying those few around these goals.  It’s a conquerable task.  Be visual about it to your team.  Let them join you in painting a picture of the end game.  

Maybe even video best practices.  Let those few help to start a momentum through various creative media outlets.  I mean, we could always use more cat videos, right?

Colour My World

Know your audience.  I can’t tell you how many times that advice has come out of my mouth.  Very often, people get too comfortable too fast.  Quick rapport development is an appealing quality, to be sure, but not at the sacrifice of the demeanor of the formation.

Lots of locker room talk consideration over the past couple of weeks in light of the Donald Trump hot mic bus recordings being released.  He and Billy Bush quickly established a “buddy” relationship.  And while, the majority of response has been to condemn the words along with sentiment and systemic treatment of women, it would be unwise to consider it in such a small context.  Trump’s words have been repeated in locker rooms since I was old enough to change for gym class right up through board rooms since I was experienced enough to have an executive role. 

Period movies and television shows from the 50’s and early 60’s show the dichotomy of family life and business life.  The male character is a member of the 1^st Baptist or Presbyterian church in town with his wife and kids; they raise their kids to be good Americans, respectful students and to be seen and not heard.  At work, that same male may participate in an affair with his secretary, in shady business dealings to undercut another within the company, and in drinks at 3PM to discuss work and women with his boss.  Very stereotypical, I know, but much of the content and context in those period dramas.

Our audience is no longer known by look alone.  White boys chatting it up about a woman’s anatomy and ability to score isn’t an inclusive strategy for corporate culture.  You cannot make a decision just based upon look as our workplace is no longer a homogeneous pool.  And further, those who do look the same as you aren’t necessarily coming from the same background as you.  It’s a whole new world.  And whether it’s Donald Trump on a bus or Bill Clinton on a golf course, any commentary based upon those assumptions is more than unwise; it’s deadly to our culture.

In the small kingdoms we manage in our workplaces, we may not be able to change the world, but we can influence one sphere.  Of course, the liability around harassment is evident.  It’s not okay to allow language that demeans and cheapens another, whether based on sex, race, religion, medical history, orientation or age, to permeate a workplace.  It’s illegal, if not federally, then likely on a state level.  You have a responsibility to protect the company you represent.  Work for change to minimize such liability.

And yet, as people we may have a deeper responsibility than merely the law.  What are we telling the future about us?  Our ability to engage at this level is just what a role in management and in human resources should be focused upon.  Process improvement, sales objectives and growth planning are necessary and the core duty for some of you.  Don’t disregard those needs.  Yet, those strategies and duties can be offered in a better context. 

The drum beating for employee engagement is loud.  To what are we asking them to engage?  Our company?  OK.  So, what is our company like?  Do you really want them to be engaged in and to it?  Think of it as you might a romantic relationship.  As things progress, your love interest gets to see your quirks about washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, etc.  This person, also, experiences you more fully, warts and all.  That relationship will likely require you to change some things – maybe you need to make the bed, to put your dishes in the dishwasher instead of the sink, to throw out your porn.  Whatever you need to do, you may do to make the environment for your relationship bloom and grow more. 

Those same considerations at the workplace should occur (If you have porn at the workplace…yikes.  Let’s talk offline).  What is the willingness of the executive team to sacrifice to allow the relationship of the company and its employees to bloom and grow?  If it’s locker room talk that needs to be addressed, then let it go.  Don’t make excuses for it.  Uncover biases and systemic limiters, and then remove them.  Inclusivity is a popular term, and a respectable one, but to what are we including people?  Once they see it, they may not want to be included.  What a sad possibility.  But it’s correctable.

It’s important to remember that this is not about politics.  That may have been the most recent context we’re seeing, but it’s not the only environment where such a lack of care about people is evident.  Our workplaces may be run by locker room talking, “real housewives” attitude-mongering, bulldozing leaders.  Confront it.  Categorizing people or a person in an unhealthy or demeaning manner is unacceptable.  Act upon it and work for change.

My life is full of strong women, Christians, disabled individuals, gay men, multi-cultural heritages and races.  I like them each individually.  And though I may look like you, please don’t come to me to share in a negative view or a demeaning approach regarding any of them or what they “represent.”  It’s not funny.  

Don't Worry, Be Happy

There are almost 92,000 books being sold on Amazon.com right now that contain the word "happy" in the title.  This does not necessarily include all of the books that are actually about happiness.  Nor the ones that are about satisfaction, contentment or peace.  

#WorkHuman was a conference recently held by +Globoforce in Orlando. And while it was a conference founded upon recognition thoughts and strategies, there was a push towards happiness that I found refreshingly interesting.

From a scientific approach, the concept of happiness was explored by Shawn Achor.  What benefit is there to happiness in the workplace?  Of course, we would rather people be happy than sad at work.  It's not likely that any of us looks to see a line of sad people outside of our door that we need to convert to happy ones.  However, there is something to be said about our ability to promote a happier culture.  +JetBlue VP of People Michael Elliott shared how it's the job of HR, for example, to sell the success stories of the company.  Preach the ways we shine.  We have an opportunity to support the core values and encourage the mission of our organizations through a pursuit of happiness.

Consider, however, the concept of joy.  Happiness tends to be an emotional consideration, and while there are fuller perspectives, joy is more of a state of being.  What can we do to foster this level of consideration?  How can pursuing the right perspective of such a state of being impact workplace culture?

• Where does the joy come from? - Look for ways to push those around us to consider self-awareness.  Not necessarily in the metaphysical sense, but think of it in light of the wellness and mindfulness initiatives available to us.  Grounding people is a gift.  Very often, we get ensnared by the busyness of our roles.  We need to motivate ourselves to do our work because it's an expression of who we are.  Look to align the joy being cultivated in you around the functional roles of existence.  If it's out of line, you'll sense it clearly.  Adjust this in a timely manner and, then, recalibrate.
• What can the joy do for others? - In addition to the ways joy brings a stability to self, the joy one has can serve as a beacon to those looking to secure their own.  Reflecting the active nature of joy will inspire others, but will be done as a genuine by-product.  Manufacturing a trite or programmatic approach to this will be apparent to others observing, and the initiative will fail.  The honesty that joy gives is infectious and truthful.  There is something so attractive about someone who is naturally full of joy.  If you have known someone like this, think about how he/she made you feel.  Don't hide the joy at work; live it fully and others will observe it.
• What will work be like in light of joy? - A study in Britain showed that providing happiness outlets, even in small doses, could increase productivity by as much as 12%.  12%?!  Think about that.  That could be tens of thousands to hundreds of millions for our companies.  Amazing to think that encouraging happiness could lead to such results.  And the feeling of happiness leads to an openness to joy, contentment and satisfaction.  When workplaces cultivate this type of depth, talent does not look to leave as willingly, especially those who've worked in other environments.  There will be a great appeal to remain connected and committed to who and what the company is.

None of this is meant to cover up the difficulties that come along with living.  Sickness, financial strain, divorce, death...all of this and more vie for our attention and steal our joy.  We should not look to be smiling idiots or attempt to gloss over the pain that others might have.  We're still people, People!  

The thoughts here are reflective of the measurable affect that happiness can bring to the workplace.  While at this conference, +The Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research founder was on-hand to share his perspective on life.  To hear someone who could have become rather bitter and jaded at the unfairness of life, share that he loves his life, is humbling.  The gripes about work - the amount to do, the managers that annoy and the lack of variety of coffee flavors - find a better context and become minimized in light of such a perspective.  Michael J. Fox shared his heart and his joy.  The lesson for all of us is to do the same.

You Don't Own Me

It's not likely to be news that words have power.  They have power to alter behavior, influence change, lead a revolution and cause the deepest kinds of pain possible.  As professionals, we might forget that people still are impacted by words.  Perhaps we've taken to bending the truth in our conversations to either soften the blow or paint a better picture of things so that employees don't lose heart.  While there are a couple of studies that try to prove the value of lying, there are more that point to honest transparency as the beneficial route.  Whatever the reasons might be, our words matter.  

Have you seen the little girl telling her dad a lie about what happened to Barbie (and why?).  You must!  Amazing insight into our DNA.  We're not taught how to lie; it's a natural phenomenon for us.  We just do it in order to avoid trouble, deflect attention or save our skin.  Truth is easily replaced by a lie.  Consider the countless times people get pulled over.  Think everyone tells the cop the truth?  Or even playing the "I was speeding? I had no idea. Oh my gosh," when you know full well that you were flooring it.  Some of us give Oscar-worthy performances!

Fear is a huge motivator of our words.  What would it mean if an HR Manager said that he/she didn't know something that's HR related?  It shouldn't be a shock, but fear might stand in the way of that HR Manager being honest.  He/She might be afraid of looking weak or not-as-experienced as a supervisor would expect.  And so, if we are backed into a corner with our fear, we might lie.  We might say we know something.  We might say we have done a certain task.  We might offer perspective as if we've been there-done that.  All of it is dishonest.  And now those lies have to be built upon as time goes on.  Those lies own you.

Organizational health functions best in honesty.  When staff know that the words of the leaders are real, the response is genuine.  In late 2008, when the economy in the US fell due to the housing crisis, company leaders sat with their employees to let them know what was going on.  In some of those conversations, layoffs were presented as a viable option to save money.  The response from many employees was to keep everyone and just reduce every employee's hours.  They understood what was happening, why it was happening, and based upon the honest dialogue from leadership, volunteered a plan of action.  While the stress of the economics was real and cannot be denied, there was health in the approach to all get into the same boat and hold on.

It is important to note that no one is alone in this.  In some ways, we've helped create a culture of untruth.  Our fantasies are affirmed more than our realities.  We have allowed our leadership to be untrustworthy for a long while.  Just looking at our political landscape reflects such a position. Our role as management, as leaders, is to break the cycle.  I am not naive to think that this will mean open doors for everything with full disclosure.  Quite frankly, there are details that are not for the world to know.  This is not dishonest if it's shared just that way...."Here's what I can tell you and understand there are some parts that I cannot offer much detail due to (confidentiality, a matter of law, unsettled circumstances, etc.)"

We have one another to stand with in our doubt, in our lack of knowledge and in our fear. It's okay to not know something.  That's the beauty of asking our community, of attending seminars and workshops, of developing friendships with managers from other companies.  We can't know it all, and we have to be okay to say so.  Honestly, I know for myself and some others who've shared with superiors where our difficulties were, we were not fired.

Perhaps, you find this whole topic puzzling or amateur.  Fine, but the reality is that there is enough fear pushing a lack of truth in our workplaces.  If it's not you, it may be someone working for you.  Do our staff feel that they can say what they don't know without fear of reprisal?  Are they apt to lie?  How can we cultivate a different environment?

In HR, we see people lie often.  It's sad, but true.  We read resumes containing experiences that never occurred.  We hear from employees in a disciplinary situation covering their butts.  We hear executives tell us that everyone will keep their jobs as a result of a merger.  It is all around us.  We can push for a more honest culture by being an example first.

Hello

People management as a career carries with it many necessary skill sets.  A bit of counseling, a dash of conflict management, a hint of patience and a strong dose of listening skills blend together to ensure that the staff you serve know they are heard and valued.  The management of people is not a natural ebb and flow for most; it’s a dance mastered through practice, research and observation.  Curious, I don’t see much of it taught on the university level.  Management courses on business development, organizational development and finance (and their off-shoots) fill the curriculum for collegiate study.

I recall taking an interpersonal skills course in college, and there were seven of us on day one.  By day two one had dropped as the size of the class was already too uncomfortable for him.  So, the six of us plowed through various psychology and communicative styles in order to appreciate other approaches and develop our own more deeply.  It was thoroughly challenging and incredibly vulnerable.

So much of what was emphasized was basic response-oriented training.  When someone walks into a room, acknowledge that person - say hello, ask them to have a seat, ask if you can help them.  Body language, verbal cues and facial expression are a functional part of managing people.  Further, and more likely for many these days, the tonality and inflection of the voice on the phone, and the sentence construct on a text or email, set the stage for an appropriate conversation with an employee.

As our work in the human resources field continues to move in a metric-oriented discipline, which has great merit, it is vital that we not lose our people management skill set.  And if you’ve never had a people management skill set, then it is time to work on it. 

When people come to you, there has already been a story playing for them.  Pain or anger may have taken root, depending on the situation.  Broken relationships cut deep – whether breakups, divorces or death.  Our job is to get to the heart of it.  We’re not counselors, understood, but if an employee is walking into your office, then bet your bottom dollar that whatever the issue is will distract that person from work.  It is now a work consideration.

Basic coping mechanisms may be extended to the person, and sometimes that happens naturally just by having someone on whom to unload.  The skill sets of the employee could be clouded, but our act of listening and providing visual cues of such attention might move those clouds.  The ability to jump back into the swing of “normal” functioning may be as simple as that.  Yet, when the door is consistently closed and the email goes unanswered, an employee dives deeper into his/her issue, making it more difficult to un-cloud.

Everyone has a story.  There is no one free from baggage.  Everyone wants more time.  Everyone has regrets (or would like a do-over on some things).  Everyone has lost their way for a bit.  Remember this as a people manager.  Those we manage do look to us.  What do they see?  Of course, depending on the situation, there are likely to be more steps after listening, but the first step sets the right tone.

Answer the phone, respond to the email, open your door.  Engage with your people.  It doesn’t need to be seen as an employee engagement objective.  It should be seen as being a person.  A person who can support another person.  And sometimes we’ll have quite a heavy burden to share in with this employee.  We can manage the road together.