The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Is it really?  I heard a woman severely curse off a Walmart Customer Service representative, while the woman’s 2 year-old child was in tow listening to every word.  I have had quite a few people tell me this is the worst time of year.  I have seen more than the usual amount of birds being flipped out of car windows on the highway.  And I have observed a toddler lose their mind on the streets of NYC because his mother wouldn’t buy him the toy he needed.  Ah, the holidays.

And when I walk through the halls of companies, I see employees devoid of emotion going through the task-management of the holiday season with no connection to one another or to the joy of the season.  I see managers with scowls, associates with the faintest hint of a fake smile and HR people stressed out of their minds due to W2’s, ACA 1095’s, compliance reporting, labor law updates, minimum wage changes and the list goes on.

Know what I say?  Enjoy the time.  Embrace the thrill of the season.  Go to a department store or mall and watch the little kids excitedly get on Santa’s lap.  Find those who have not yet been jaded by life and have learned to hate this time.  Change the vantage point you’re working from.

True followers of behavioral modification will tell you that change happens now.  Just make the change, that’s the easy part.  Stop with the frown and get on with the smile.  And yet, the trick in behavioral modification is sustainability.  What can be done to keep behavior changed?  How does the decision I’ve made today last longer than just today?

For all people, it comes down to the same decision being made every day.  Today may be the first day, but there are more days to consider and decide on.  I know for me that today has enough troubles of its own, so I don’t need to travel too far down the road of what might be in days to come.  Focus on today first.  What am I doing and why?

For those with real pain that seems to pierce the veil during the holiday season, I hear you.  Take courage because there are many in the same boat.  Find each other and decide to be a reason for joy for him/her.  Look for ways to serve others and watch how much the burden lifts from you.  It’s not idealistic; it’s psychological. 

My friend +Steve Browne often speaks of being positive in HR.  One of the best ways to do it is to foster deliberate and simple steps to think differently.  We don’t have to have our Master’s degrees or 300 letters after our names to be able to affect change in thought and dynamic.  We have to inspire others to make healthy decisions for themselves and, in turn, for the organization.  Our culture is impacted greatly by such an attitude in staff.

When I watch “Elf” each season, I am always struck by the forced conformity placed upon Buddy by his father and the world around him.  His overly enthusiastic self is asked to be buttoned down into a suit and tie.  He rebels, puts back on the elf suit and reconnects with Santa.  The rebellion is based upon a decision.  He decides to return to the positivity of what he knows.  We, too, have the choice to return to the positivity of what we know.  You're always going to have a new law to adhere to; we always do so don't stress.  Get the elf suit on and enjoy this time of year!

Hello

People management as a career carries with it many necessary skill sets.  A bit of counseling, a dash of conflict management, a hint of patience and a strong dose of listening skills blend together to ensure that the staff you serve know they are heard and valued.  The management of people is not a natural ebb and flow for most; it’s a dance mastered through practice, research and observation.  Curious, I don’t see much of it taught on the university level.  Management courses on business development, organizational development and finance (and their off-shoots) fill the curriculum for collegiate study.

I recall taking an interpersonal skills course in college, and there were seven of us on day one.  By day two one had dropped as the size of the class was already too uncomfortable for him.  So, the six of us plowed through various psychology and communicative styles in order to appreciate other approaches and develop our own more deeply.  It was thoroughly challenging and incredibly vulnerable.

So much of what was emphasized was basic response-oriented training.  When someone walks into a room, acknowledge that person - say hello, ask them to have a seat, ask if you can help them.  Body language, verbal cues and facial expression are a functional part of managing people.  Further, and more likely for many these days, the tonality and inflection of the voice on the phone, and the sentence construct on a text or email, set the stage for an appropriate conversation with an employee.

As our work in the human resources field continues to move in a metric-oriented discipline, which has great merit, it is vital that we not lose our people management skill set.  And if you’ve never had a people management skill set, then it is time to work on it. 

When people come to you, there has already been a story playing for them.  Pain or anger may have taken root, depending on the situation.  Broken relationships cut deep – whether breakups, divorces or death.  Our job is to get to the heart of it.  We’re not counselors, understood, but if an employee is walking into your office, then bet your bottom dollar that whatever the issue is will distract that person from work.  It is now a work consideration.

Basic coping mechanisms may be extended to the person, and sometimes that happens naturally just by having someone on whom to unload.  The skill sets of the employee could be clouded, but our act of listening and providing visual cues of such attention might move those clouds.  The ability to jump back into the swing of “normal” functioning may be as simple as that.  Yet, when the door is consistently closed and the email goes unanswered, an employee dives deeper into his/her issue, making it more difficult to un-cloud.

Everyone has a story.  There is no one free from baggage.  Everyone wants more time.  Everyone has regrets (or would like a do-over on some things).  Everyone has lost their way for a bit.  Remember this as a people manager.  Those we manage do look to us.  What do they see?  Of course, depending on the situation, there are likely to be more steps after listening, but the first step sets the right tone.

Answer the phone, respond to the email, open your door.  Engage with your people.  It doesn’t need to be seen as an employee engagement objective.  It should be seen as being a person.  A person who can support another person.  And sometimes we’ll have quite a heavy burden to share in with this employee.  We can manage the road together.

I Fought the Law

Try to watch “Law and Order” as if you’ve never seen an episode before.  Pretend like those two Bum-Bumps are the first time you’ve heard them.  It’s fascinating to watch the entire hour and see how the two detectives process the investigation which typically leads to the court case.  I used to watch the original “Law and Order” religiously.  Yes, I know that there are SVU, CI, SUV and hybrid versions, but I was a fan of the original.  The course of action taken by the detectives is methodical, a bit stale and thorough, but it works.

For the employee who comes to the HR department with a complaint, inquiry or charge, there is an expectation for answers and investigation.  HR loves the answers, but perhaps to a fault.  Our ability to provide solution to the complaint may not really handle the issue at hand.  The employee can feel his/her issue has been minimized as he/she leaves your office (or cubicle area or working table or Segway mobile office).  Are we satisfied with just an “answer” or do we need to spend time trying to understand where this issue comes from?

Honestly, there are times that a simple answer is all that is needed.  Let’s not make a mountain out of molehill.  If someone comes to complain about not being off for Arbor Day, that may be a very quick conversation.  Something like, “I’m sorry that you’d like the company to be closed for Arbor Day, but if you have PTO available to you, perhaps you could plan on using some in order to spend time planting trees to honor the day.”  Smile sincerely and usher them out.  Close the door and reflect on why you’ve chosen the career you have.  After a few minutes, you’ll be back at it!

But what about the ones that take a bit more?  If an employee asks about hours not paid on a paycheck, then perhaps a quick look at the time system, finding where the data was corrupt or not transferred into payroll will prevent the occurrence in the future.  Perhaps there is a bit of management training needed.  Perhaps the employee needs a reminder on the time clock.  Perhaps it’s a one-time Gremlin in the system.  All it would take is a little bit of research mixed with a little bit of conversation and/or training.

And then, there are the ultimate investigations, such as harassment, discrimination or theft.  A process for this investigation should be in place.  What will it take for the company to handle the claims presented?  Is there a path to follow?  No? 

There are components of good investigation that are universal.  Try to work within a flow of process in those components in order to gather the information needed.  An investigation is serious and it does require professionalism in approach.  If you are the HR person who would lead or conduct the investigation, have you established yourself in the company as someone capable of such work?  If you’ve been relegated or allowed yourself to be relegated to the party-planning HR person or the gossip-laden HR person, then it’s not likely that you’ll gather all of the data necessary in your investigation.

Staff may not be able to draw a line between the “Buddy HR” person and the “Detective HR” person you’re trying to be.  That is a tall order.  As such, determine whether outside help might be needed.  Does your process allow for this possibility?  Between the HR role played, the characters in the investigation and the subject matter involved, an outside expert might be the most beneficial for the organization.  Be okay with letting someone in.  It’s not about dirty laundry but about ascertaining the truth and finding solution, however difficult that may be.

Be clear, too, in the fact that you will need to speak with others.  When an employee starts his/her complaint to you with “Please don’t say anything, but…”, you can be sure that you’re likely going to need to say something to someone else.  A true investigation will need facts and accounts from all parties named and involved.  Keeping this between us is not possible, let alone the matter of law that may be in play.  Disclosure may be required.  Consult your counsel if you have questions in any of these areas.  Likely an attorney will tell you that you cannot promise to keep what’s shared only between you two.

There are great resources available to you to help with investigation.  Take the time to research and develop a plan prior to needing a plan.  You will be able to approach plan development with less stress and with more clarity of thought.  Talk to your senior team, your counsel, your HR colleagues in other companies, your SHRM group…anyone who has been through developing a process.  Learn from their victories and hiccups.

And while it may not be the wisest to wear a badge around the office as if you’re the cop on duty, you should establish yourself as being an integral part of the investigative process at your company.  Just pin the badge on the inside of your suit coat or sweater.  You can know it’s there.  Bum-Bump.

The Boss

Managing people is a skill. Yes, there are attributes that come easier for some which allow them to manage easier, but the use and refinement of those attributes is what makes it right.  The guilt some feel about not being a good manager is often a result of comparison to one of these “naturals.”

Are you a natural?  Do you find yourself easily speaking with your team?  Do you find that there is an ability to connect with people that just flows from you?  That’s wonderful! But, it doesn’t mean that you’re managing people.  It could mean that you are a great friend, a great listener, or a great motivator, but it doesn’t mean management is natural.  Being the boss is meant to be categorized by effectiveness, best use of talent and profitability, to start, not merely being the "fun" manager.

Think about a boss you’ve had that you liked. Perhaps the reason you liked him/her is because of the great manner with which your department was led.  You liked that he/she took the reigns, presented as a resource for the team and kept everyone focused on the mission.  You like that.  You crave good direction.  You desire knowledgeable people to take seriously their role.  Perhaps.

Or perhaps it was because you connected with him/her relationally.  You had common interests.  You shared a passion for sports, for a hobby or for beer (maybe beer is a hobby?).  You got to know each other’s families.  You shared time outside of work being social.  Did that make the person a great manager?  Or merely a great friend?

I am not suggesting that every manager become a Miranda Priestly and remain clearly unfriendly and distant.  However, I am suggesting that swinging the pendulum too far the other way might make managing just as a difficult.  Hone in the skill sets needed to manage effectively and use those skills as you rally your team together.

Time – There is a skill involved in planning and in the usage of time.  If you are someone that just lets things “get away from you” then you aren’t managing.  Time needs to be managed.  Haven’t we all looked at the clock during the work day and thought, “How can it be 3PM? I haven’t gotten done what I needed to today.”  Be competent in time management and help your team to pursue a similar goal.  Efficiencies to process are certainly business-centric and are worth the effort.

Material Knowledge – What do we make, how do we make it, why do we make it.  If it’s a service-related industry, follow the same pattern – what do we do, how do we do it, why do we do it.  You’ve got to know this backward and forward, and be able to translate it well to your team.  They will look to you to see how seriously they should know the answers to those questions.  If it’s just a job for you, then don’t be surprised when it’s just the same for your team.  Be passionate about the ingredients, materials, resources used to get done what you are tasked to get done.

Communication – “Hey, Bud, how ya doin’ today?” should not serve as the moniker of your relational investment.  What does that communicate?  Likely, you are a necessary person in my life and I can’t avoid it.  Intentionality in communication is necessary.  Plan what needs to be said; don’t hope you remember.  Know what and why things have to be shared, the time it will take to do so and the opportunities for that communication to be collaborative. 

Of course, there are more elements than this, but deciding to become proficient in these areas will certainly impact the team being managed.  Once there is a mastery in skill development and process, then begin to attack the next step.  It will become second nature.

The effort matters.  A manager who is deliberate in seeking to refine those skills or to develop new ones sets a stronger tone in his/her department right away.  Your staff will recognize that you’re not there to be everyone’s best friend, but to be a developer of talent by taking seriously your own development.  It also communicates a belief that not everyone is a “natural.”  It’s okay to work at it.  Think about the impact on the team you lead if they see you studying, practicing and exercising these skills.  You will be encouraging them to do the same in their areas of functional responsibility and soft skill development.

There were many days were I would have liked to do a “Devil-Wears-Prada-Throw-My Jacket-On-The-Head-Of-An-Employee” moment, but I didn’t.  I had to make the decision that the proactive development of my management style would be compromised by either creating a too-friendly demeanor or a too-mean demeanor.  So, hold onto your jacket as you walk in and hang it up yourself!

Digging Your Scene

Dance, baby, dance.  Get up and move.  Shake your thing.  That’s it, make it groove.  Use your hips.  Get down into the floor.  Arch your back more.  Work it!

Those are various performance phrases used in the dance world to encourage excellence in the performer.  Uncomfortable?  Did it make you think I’d finally snapped?  (Don’t answer that).  A dancer needs to have his/her performance graded early on so that he/she can make corrections to the movement in the dance.  If a choreographer has developed a sequence of movement to tell a story and thoughtfully chosen a piece of music to compliment the story, it’s vital that the dancer perform the movement exactly to match the intention of the story.  Real time performance review is necessary.

In the case of the dancer, the choreographer is there teaching the dance.  He/She can then provide timely feedback, such as listed above, and encourage the dancer to move differently or with more precision when working to execute the story through dance.  Travis Wall, one of the best current choreographers, has to be unyielding in seeing his vision executed and so has to watch his dancers often and provide commentary.  A dancer then adjusts in real time.  And when the performance is shared with an audience, the efforts are displayed, and in Travis’s case, usually without flaw.

Intentionally taking the time to watch the scenes of performance that our employees create is a responsibility of management.  It is not to sit in an office and hope they are doing what they should be.  It’s not just looking at numbers at the end of a day or week, and then make grandiose decisions about staffing and product or service implementation.  The repetition of bad choices made in this context overflows into poor corporate culture, low gross sales, inferior candidates and frustrated management. 

Watch what’s happening in the “dance” scenes you’re creating at work.  Give feedback.  It does not need to be done via the official performance review annual form.  It doesn’t have to be a quarterly review.  It CAN include those things, but that’s not all it is.

As a kid, when I was doing my homework, my mom would look over my shoulder every so often to check.  If the writing was rushed and sloppy, she would tell me to erase it and write it again.  The longer she took to check in on me left open the possibility that I would have more to erase.  If she caught me after only doing a few, it was more manageable to correct the behavior and the remaining work was done neater.  It’s the same for management.  Observe often.

Micromanagement, by the way, is not the same as observing often.  A course correction is the responsibility of the manager by knowing why and how staff are travelling a certain road.  A micromanager is telling staff how to move their left foot forward, and then the right foot, and then the left again, and then the right and so on.  Travis can dance the choreography he creates himself, but the point is to take that vision and entrust it to the skill sets demonstrated in the dancers he works with regularly.  The cause is spread to a wider circle and therefore a wider impact.

Give staff the opportunity to perform.  Tell them the objectives and watch what they do.   And along the way, affirm what’s working and advise on what should look or be different.  Keep coming back to the mission or purpose of the work.  Managers have to be involved in what their teams are doing, with consistency and investment.  Come up alongside those employees who are working to make the mission happen and encourage them.  Praise and critique are encouraging, if it comes from an involved, invested perspective.  Do your staff see you that way?

The surprise in good performance review is that it seems very much like conversation.  It feels very much like smart people sitting together to get better at the responsibilities they have.  It opens the door for a deeper understanding of the support, tools and practice needed.  And it also allows for honest dialogue, due to the consistency of review, regarding who can do what’s needed.  Sometimes staff will even call themselves out to say that they don’t have the full skill set required.  And those are employees you want to keep for a long time, even if it means a role change.

Like me, for instance.  I know that in my mind, I dance with as much passion and skill as Alex Wong and could absolutely handle the choreography of Travis Wall.  And though I have been known to “get down”, the vision in my mind won’t make it a reality.  When I leap around the house with my daughters, they remind me, too, that I might not quite have the skills to dance or to choreograph.  Seriously? Have you seen me do the Cha-Cha Slide? Breathtaking.